“We surveyed 100 married women: name a possession your husband pays more attention to than you.”
And some amateur player answered, “sports,” which didn’t even make sense in the context of the question.
Of course, it wasn’t on the survey, and I started to berate her family for including her as member of their team.
But then again, I think every woman in America knows exactly what she meant.
Men cannot physically possess sports, but they certainly are possessed by them.
With football season now in full swing, I’ve been rudely reminded of what it feels like to pose questions that go unanswered until halftime and to be greeted with a laugh at the thought of weekend afternoons being productive again before February.
But I realized I’m fighting a losing battle when we didn’t miss a moment of the Michigan vs. Notre Dame game only to hear my boyfriend announce during it that he actively hates both teams. So now we watch football just to be watching apparently?
So given that the sport is here to stay, I’ve come up with a few tactics to keep football season engaging for those of us who can’t tell a touchdown from a field goal.
You won’t catch me painting my face or sporting a team jersey, but I enjoy a good theme party just as much as the next guy. So last weekend, I threw on my favorite navy and white dress, accessorized with a few orange accents and voila – Bears fan!
We walked up to our neighborhood tavern and any excuse to have a cocktail and nachos in the middle of the day is good enough for me. I tuned out the football and instead took in the atmosphere. Good food, good friends and wait a minute …
All the Single Ladies
It was 1 p.m. on a Sunday and the place was packed with tons of eligible bachelors. Single gals, I hope you’re taking notes. No dimly lit bar, no cover charge and no chance that some loser will ask you to dance. It’s broad daylight and here they all are!
Make it Relatable
Pay no attention to all that talk about who’s in the pocket and who got sacked. Reality TV and popular magazines have given sports stars an arena to collide with our favorite celebrities. Make the game du jour a human interest story. Who’s engaged to Kim Kardashian this week? Are Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen expecting again? While he’s keeping score, I’m keeping tabs on the gossip.
Pick a Team
You don’t have to know the stats; there’s a 50/50 chance you’ll pick a winner every time! Four hours of football is much more tolerable when you’re invested, so make a friendly wager.
For most men, football is a rite of passage. A man without football is a woman without style. It’s how they communicate, and that’s not changing anytime soon.
Luckily, football is a sport that’s rooted in tradition, and it’s in those rituals that someone like me can get excited.