Yelling While Passing
I wouldn’t consider myself a runner, but I do enjoy putting on my short shorts and running the loop in Cherokee Park a couple times a week. The other day I was running my way up to Dog Hill with my headphones on, listening to one of my favorite podcasts when I had an obnoxious biker scream in my ear that they were passing me on my left as they were passing me on the left. After jumping like a fish out of water and bringing my heart rate down to an already out of shape rate, I thought, doesn’t the yelling at me that you’re passing while you’re passing really do more harm than good?
Let’s consider what could happen if you don’t yell at me:
- You pass me.
Let’s consider what could happen if you do yell at me:
- You could startle me, causing me to jump into your line, resulting in a catastrophic crash that leaves us both paralyzed.
- You could bust me ear drum, resulting in me falling to the ground in pain as you run over my agonizing body.
- You could pass by me, scaring the crap out of me and raising my heart rate to an unacceptable level, resulting in heart failure.
So this begs me to ask, are you really such a bad rider that you can’t navigate around a skinny guy running in an open lane? If you are then get off your bike, throw it off a cliff and please for gods sake do not get behind the wheel of a car. And don’t give me that “it’s just safer to make sure you know your surroundings” stuff. I know my surroundings. I won’t run into you and you don’t ride your bike into me. It’s that easy people.
Taping Your Broken Light
Your brake light is busted. Maybe you got into a wreck. Maybe you backed into a school child. Maybe a member of the Mafia took a bat to it. Whatever happened, you have to replace it or put tape over it so the bright bulb doesn’t blind me while driving. It’s the law. Usually people will cover the red shattered plastic with red duct tape, matching the cover and still letting the light illuminate the back of the tape.
While driving yesterday I noticed a truck with brown packing tape covering the entire red portion of their tail light. It was so dark and layered on that even though covering my line of sight to the bare bulb, it was still doing more harm than good. Is me looking at no more than a Christmas light really going to obstruct my view so bad that I veer off the road? I would argue that not being able to see your brake light come on at all is actually doing more harm than good.
This one goes back a few weeks to Thunder Over Louisville. While watching the American flag fly by, hoisted over the hundreds of thousands of people and listening to my favorite part of Thunder, Old Glory, I couldn’t help but be taken out of the moment by the American-hating pinko commie that was pointing his cat toy at the Red, White and Blue.
When I was a kid in the ’90s, laser pointers were at their peak. Every kid had one. The cool kids had the ones that had the detachable tips that would create shapes with your obnoxious red light. I did not. I did however have enough of them pointed in my eyes that I still see red blurs from time to time.
Sure you can drive your cats crazy with them or point at a map from across the room, but the damage done by these things far outweighs the good. When was the last time you were giving a presentation or out at dinner and thought to yourself “I really wish I had a laser pointer with me right now?” Instead these pen size death rays are used by the dumbed down part of our civilization to ruin concerts and firework displays for us.
What do you think does more harm than good?